


What We Never Said

by elfenphoenix



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: And a little bit of angst, Class reunion, I haven't decided yet, M/M, Mutual Pining, PTSD, but there's definitely gonna be fluff, there might be smut in this there might not be
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-04-25
Updated: 2017-04-25
Packaged: 2018-10-23 17:40:29
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,596
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10724091
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/elfenphoenix/pseuds/elfenphoenix
Summary: With the war against the Galra Empire finally over, the Paladins of Voltron returned to Earth, attempting to go back to the lives they left behind. It’s been a few years since then, and not everyone has adjusted well. Keith and Lance haven’t talked to each other in years, but an invitation to a garrison class reunion has a lot of old memories coming back, and feelings that they’ve both kept buried all of this time. They weren’t able to tell the truth back then, but this might be their chance to let it out. After this much time, what do they have to lose?





	What We Never Said

Since Keith very, very rarely checked his e-mail, it was surprising that he even saw the invitation to the garrison’s class reunion. Even more surprising was that he’d received one at all, since he hadn’t actually graduated with the rest of the class. His time as a Paladin of Voltron notwithstanding, he’d dropped out even before any of it had happened. But the invitation was there, and he didn’t need to ask Pidge to hack the source in order to see that it was legitimate.

More than likely, the garrison was trying to use his success in the military as a way to crow that they put out exemplary students, even though he’d dropped out. Looking around at the medals strewn haphazardly around his cabin, it made sense. He was an even more decorated soldier than Shiro was, at this point. Which Keith would tell him, if it hadn’t been more than three years since he’d seen him.

Communication between him and the other Paladins had slowly faded away after they returned to Earth. He was still in contact with Hunk and Pidge, more or less, but they were both too busy with work to come out and talk most of the time, and Shiro had stayed behind with Allura and Coran on the Castle of Lions, mainly because he doubted the other humans would respond any better to his Galra tech arm this time than they did last time. And then there was Lance.

Just the thought of him sent a pang of regret through Keith. How long had they fought with and against each other? How many close calls, sarcastic comments, unexpected intimate moments? And yet none of it had really gone anywhere. They’d just… separated, leaving Keith to wonder if maybe he’d just been imagining all of it. What were they, anyway? Even now, it seemed inappropriate to call Lance his “friend”. But he was his “something”. Maybe that was the most frustrating part. They’d walked away from each other without actually clarifying what that “something” was.

He looked at the e-mail again, his finger hovering over the “delete” command. He didn’t _really_ have the right to go, anyway. Even if he _did_ fit in with regular people.

But he hesitated. What if Lance was there? It was a small hope, but the pain of leaving everything open the way he had was killing him. He’d been a coward, too afraid of what might happen, to tell Lance anything, and that bugged him more than anything. All of the medals and military honors on Earth meant nothing if he couldn’t even admit that he liked a stupid blue-eyed boy. Hell, maybe he’d only tried to earn them because he was trying to cover up his own cowardice. But who could tell?

Does it count as “being in love” if the other person doesn’t know about it, or is that just creepy? Is there some kind of provision for pining after the same person for a certain amount of years that makes it count as “being in love” anyway? Because no matter how many people or aliens he met, he always kept coming back to Lance, even now.

How long had it been? He didn’t really know when it had started. Maybe there had been a tickling of it back when they had been cadets in the garrison, with Lance pretending to be Keith’s rival. Maybe it was when they met again, rescuing Shiro.

But he hadn’t _known_ at that point. He hadn’t known when he clung to the back of the pilot’s chair in the Blue Lion, praying that he was not going to die because of Lance’s piloting skills, or lack thereof. He hadn’t known when they fought Sendak the first time, retrieving the Red Lion. He hadn’t known it when they’d been trying to bond as a team, ultimately ending up handcuffed to Lance and locked in a foodfight against Allura and Coran.

The moment he _knew_ was when Sendak invaded the castle and Lance almost died protecting Coran from a sudden explosion. That moment when Keith was suddenly unsure whether this crazy idiot with the stupid jokes and constant flirtations and blinding grins… when he didn’t know if he’d make it. And Keith had been trapped outside, completely powerless to do anything about it. When he didn’t know what he’d do if Lance was suddenly gone… that was when he _knew_.

And so many times after that, it had been a thought that passed through his mind, words at the tip of his tongue that he swallowed back Every. Single. Time. because he was afraid of what would happen if he did. What would happen to the small connection they _did_ have if he was completely rejected? The thought had terrified him. So instead he had clung to that little “something” as if his life depended on it. Even when he plunged into an asteroid field without hesitation after Rolo and Nyma to get the Blue Lion back for Lance. Even when he’d saved Lance from getting sucked out through the airlock, or when his heart rate had spiked when they found Lance and Hunk in the mermaid’s world after being separated.

There were so many times Keith had found himself so in love with that idiot that he couldn’t stand it, feeling like the words were wrapping themselves around his heart and squeezing it. Stupid times, like when they were outside the castle and started a fight with the green spores floating all around them. He still remembered the smirk on Lance’s face, meeting it with one of his own. He’d been a little sad to see it over.

Or when they were chased by a mall cop on an Unuru swap moon, and Lance had shown up out of nowhere on a flying cow of all things, grinning like he was having the time of his life. That was the Lance that drove him crazy, in all possible ways.

He read the e-mail again. It must have been sent to him months ago-- the reunion was that same night, with commands for “formal dress”. Keith turned back to his room, wondering if he actually had anything that counted as “formal.” There was his military dress uniform, but it didn’t feel right to wear it.

He started throwing around the clothes strewn across the floor, trying to find anything that counted as formal. He used to be so clean and organized, but ever since he’d quit active duty, he just didn’t have the energy to keep it together anymore. Clothes, clothes, clothes…

He dug up the Altean outfit he had left over from his time on the Castle. He didn’t even remember taking it with him, but… it looked formal enough. Not that anyone would recognize where they came from. Except maybe the other Paladins.

He cursed at himself for letting this tiny little hope carry him away-- Lance might not even be there-- but he still found himself hurrying to get ready, looking at himself nervously in the mirror, checking to see if he had enough fuel in his flyer. Whatever might happen, Keith was going, at least for a little while. It wasn’t like he had anything better to do.

 

~~~~~

 

*Lance’s POV*

 

At first, Lance was a little nervous to go to the reunion. He’d technically gone back to take some supplementary classes in order to get his certification, along with Pidge and Hunk, but he hadn’t actually graduated _with_ his class. He wasn’t sure if they would even remember him. He’d been away for quite some time in space, fighting as a Paladin of Voltron. Years, even. His own family had thought he was dead, so why would his classmates even remember his name?

“Hey, Mcclain! Didn’t think you’d make it!”

Lance blinked, his head spinning as he tried to recognize the person in front of him. But eventually the gears clicked into place. “Oh, it’s Hikaru! How have you been?”

“I’m still trying to get over the time we went after you guys in the simulator, even though Hunk’s vomit still hadn’t been cleaned up,” the other boy commented with a grin.

Lance winced, but laughed, rubbing the back of his head. “Man, you still remember that?! We’ve gotten _way_ better since then. I forgot about it until just now, so thanks for the reminder.”

Hikaru looked up at him skeptically. “How much better can you get?”

“Oh, you wouldn’t believe it! I’m a real pilot, you know? I once fought this giant snake-worm-dragon thing once, _in the water_ , and got through without a scratch.”

Some of his other classmates (girls) were listening now, all of them a bit doubtful. “Wait, _you_ went into space?”

“Oh yeah, it was pretty crazy. You’d be surprised how similar to us some aliens are. Though they’re not as pretty as any of you ladies,” Lance added with a wink to the girls, some of whom giggled, and some of whom just rolled their eyes and walked away.

Before he knew it, Lance was sitting on a couch in a circle of people, blabbering on about his time with the Paladins, relieved that he didn’t feel as uncomfortable as he thought he would. Even if they didn’t necessarily believe him, it was fun to talk about his adventures, listen to people laugh again. He hadn’t actually talked about Voltron in so long, even though it had been such a huge part of his life, that just talking about the time he and Keith got stuck in the elevator was exciting to him.

“But what was the pool like?” a girl asked him.

“Dude, it was in the _ceiling!_ We spent years in that ship, and even now I don’t know how the stupid thing was supposed to work. One time, I tried to…” he trailed off, his gaze suddenly focusing on the occupant of the bar on the other side of the banquet hall.

_Keith?_

He was getting to his feet before he could even excuse himself from the circle of his classmates, saying something stupid and unimportant, just so he could get away.

As soon as he’d seen Keith he’d known that was where he’d needed to be, and nothing else was important. He wasn’t thinking about where his feet were going, but they were walking. He wasn’t hearing the conversations of everyone around him, or even bothered to remember the faces he’d been surrounded by only moments before.

He really, really, really, really hadn’t expected Keith of all people to show up. Emo loner kid extraordinaire, showing up at a class reunion? No way. But there he was, hunched over the bar, looking incredibly uncomfortable and out of place.

 _Quick, think of something cool to say,_ Lance thought, sitting down on the stool next to Keith. “The Altean robes still aren’t really your color.”

_Idiot._

Keith’s head snapped up, his eyes wide as he took Lance in. Man, he looked the same, and different. He wasn’t quite as… soft-looking as he used to be. The angles of his face had hardened, his purple-black eyes seeming even darker and more serious than they had been before. But for just a moment, when he had looked up at Lance… there had been a glimpse of the same Keith he’d first met.

Keith seemed to take a little while to process what Lance had said, before scowling at him and turning back to his drink. “I didn’t really have anything else to wear.”

“Nothing at all? Quiznak, you’ve gotten even _worse_ since I last saw you.”

He noticed Keith smile a little bit, in spite of himself. “I can’t believe you still use that word,” he snorted, looking back at Lance. “I still don’t think you’re using it properly.”

Lance grinned, surprised at how genuine it felt. When was the last time one of his smiles had felt _real?_ “I’ll use it however I want. But seriously, I didn’t expect to see you of all people here. Why’d you come?”

Keith scowled down at his drink again. “Just didn’t have anything better to do.”

“Oh really?” Lance asked, spinning around in his bar stool so that he was facing the rest of the room, leaning against the bar. “Last I heard you were a real hotshot in the military. Headed toward general… or something like that.”

Keith snorted again. “You can’t be a general if you’re a regular enlisted troop, idiot. I was headed toward Sergeant Major. How’d you know?”

Lance shrugged, looking at Keith out of the corner of his eye. “Pidge told me.”

“Oh yeah, d’you know why they didn’t come?”

“Some big sciency project they’re working on for the government. Keeps them pretty busy these days,” he answered.

“Guess they’re doing okay, then?”

“Yeah, more than okay. With all of the experience they got from working with Altean and Galra tech, those two have the whole government on its knees. Or at least Pidge is. Hunk’s too nice for that.” He felt his chest contract, looking at Keith again through the edge of his vision. “What about you?”

“I… didn’t handle life back on Earth too well. I only really knew how to fight, so I didn’t know what to do with myself after I came back. It was probably pretty easy for Pidge and Hunk to adjust, since they’re geniuses, but for me, I was just a “crazy kid” talking about giant mechanical lions and flying castles. After a while I just kind of stopped trying to tell people about it. Didn’t really have a family to go to, so I just ended up back in the military. It was something to do.”

“Why’d you quit, then?” Lance asked, purely curious.

Keith frowned deeply, as if it was something he’d really prefer not to remember, rather than he was annoyed at Lance. “I didn’t really feel comfortable in the military, because… well, they don’t really like people like me.”

“Is it the Galra thing? How do they find something like that out?” Lance asked.

Keith glared at him. “It’s _not_ the ‘Galra thing.”

By now, Lance’s curiosity was burning at him pretty badly. He turned back toward the bar, leaning his chin on his hand and looking at Keith, intrigued. “So what was it?”

Keith was quiet for a while, staring at his drink. “Well, it has to do with you, to be honest.”

“ME?” Lance asked, jolting upright.

“You knew, right?”

“Knew _what_?”

“You knew I liked you… didn’t you?”

Lance blinked, wondering if he was hearing what he thought he was hearing, because if he was, his whole world had been turned upside down. “As in like friends?”

“No, you idiot.”

“But… but you never said anything!”

“I didn’t know how you’d react,” Keith mumbled, seeming more calm about this than Lance felt.

“Wait wait wait wait, back up. You mean I had a huge horrible crush on you for like five years, and didn’t say anything because I thought you’d shoot me down and never talk to me again, but instead you get to come in here and blurt out this stuff, telling me that you were doing the same quiznakking thing?!”

“Lance, if you don’t quiet down, I swear…”

“Okay, I get it!” Lance squeaked, honestly trying not to melt into a puddle. “But I didn’t want to tell you, either! You mean you would’ve said _yes_?!”

Keith looked up, blinking. “You’re serious?”

Lance seriously felt like he’d forgotten how to breathe. “I’m an idiot.”

Keith only sighed. “So am I, apparently.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I get the description of Keith's post-military experience mainly from my parents (both former soldiers). I know that a lot of people handle it differently, but this is how I know it best. 
> 
> I don't know how quickly I'll be able to update this story, since exams are coming up, but I wanted to give you guys a little preview of my newest story! I hope you like it. :D


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